Guest
Samantha

Prayer Request

I am struggling hard with my emotions. Mainly anger. I do not understand why I feel so much anger. I've dealt with grief more than half my life. But September reminds me of my late sister it would be 4years without her. Going to concerts and pne all remind me of her. I don't like to make excuses but I just don't know how to deal with the anger. I have two babies that need all my life because I'm all they got. Their dad is useless filled with excuses. I'm always blocking him because he never answers. He doesn't even give me an actual number like he'd ever answer. He only calls when he's broke and cries around how he misses us and wishes the best for us. He's an addict god knows if hes actually recovering like he says. But he's not on the streets anymore. Supposedly getting more money from disability. But still can't shell out a dime for his kids. He's never bought them anything in the 3years my boy has been here. And I stupidly believed in him twice and now have a beautiful 10m daughter. I tried to give him the 9m to get his act together and told him I don't want him around if on drugs or in her life. I don't want her to know him just so he can hurt her. My boy just cried for him the other day , but I couldn't even get a hold of him that's how useless he is. :/ I feel so stupid to have loved him and think he'd be a Good father when hes only met my girl a handful of times and visits seasonally since my son. I just wish things were better for all in of us. I wish my kids would have two parents who love them and admire them the way their supposed to. I'm mad at the world and the drugs. At myself for not being able to keep up with housework. I'll forever be hard on myself and don't know how to change it. I guess I fear I'll become a slug and never get anything done and everything will fall apart if I don't push myself. I need to be better I strive to be better. I want my kids to thrive instead of just thrive like how I was raised. This intergenerational trauma is no joke! My parents went to Indian day school and at 60 years only are only living to survive and it's quite sad to think about. All my people going through so much. This world needs to do better! I'm sick of the selfish beings being. I pray the ignorance and hatred stops. With me and with this world we are living.
All my relations šŸ™ŒšŸŖ¶

Samantha
Samantha Davis
Jul 5, 2021

Prayer Request

Good day prayer warriors. šŸ™
Now I have been a single mother for over 26months now. I tried so many times to make it work with the baby's father. I tried so hard I'm having a 2nd baby due in October. I'm so blessed but was really worried at first if this baby will be alive and healthy when she arrives. As I had bad morning sickness up until just recently. Also about doing it alone, the only person I have and trust to watch my boy is my mother. So I will be having the baby alone. The dad "tries" to come around or call. But is filled with so much excuses he's almost useless. I don't like putting him or others down but idk how else to out it. Ever since he started the drugs (meth) he's just not in a good state of mind and has been on the streets for the most part since I kicked him out for bringing his drugs in my home 2yrs ago when Baby was only months old. I haven't been looking for love since I'm expecting again. But I think it found me. This man and I have always had a thing for each other. The timing has never been right, even now I feel silly but also feeling I need love and companionship who doesn't right. He's a very nice man with very strong feelings for me. More than I even realized. He's opened up to me and tells me how he has cancer and doesn't want to do chemo. So I pray that Father God Creator of all things will heal him and let him live so we can have a lifetime together. Even if it doesn't work out that way he is a good man and pray for the best. I'm afraid to love again because how much pain I been through in the name of love. I won't hide my feelings I'll just go with it and that's what he's doing just going with it feeling healthier since he left his gf and is visiting family and his kids. Still making sure to keep in touch with me. Please Jesus have mercy on him so maybe he can be the father my kids need if that's what he wants. I trust in you creator šŸ™šŸ™šŸ™ I give my all to live my life in kindness acceptance of others to be the role model I need to for my kids and my people. I also pray for my babies father to find a way through you to get where he needs to in life and not be crushed about me loving another man because we all deserve love and he needs to understand I can't keep putting up w his excuses gaslighting narcissistic ways. I need to be happy and he needs help, more than any human can give he's got to help himself.
I believe and trust in you dear God šŸ™ Creator of all good things. Please answer my prayers for healing of ALL those that need to be healed after all the first people's children of turtle Island being recovered. This world needs you and your love more than ever. Stand with our people dear God. Amen

Samantha
Samantha Davis
Dec 21, 2020

Prayer Request

Hello prayer warriors. I have extremely bad anxiety and depression from before my boy blessed me to be his mother 18m ago. I come today to help ease my mind of financial woes šŸ„ŗ praying that God is on my side šŸ™šŸ½
I had become a single mother almost immediately after Ezekiel was born, realizing his dad was hiding his meth addiction from me, and even pretty sure he was doing it once baby arrived, not even a day old, when he went out for a "smoke" while I lay there in the hospital wondering why he's been gone so long. (I have such a forgiving heart idk why I still allow him around whenever he decides to contact us. ) Anyways I had a job interview Oct 2019, with a company that understood and wanted to help working mothers. I told them baby's only Half a year but I'd love to come to work in the new year, they completely agreed and said they'd contact me in the new year and.... March2020 happened :/ lockdown BB edited my babys 1st birthday šŸ„ŗ. So yes I applied for the cerb, thinking I qualified because my interview. Now I'm extremely worried about next year since I received an email stating I did not qualify. Now my dad is willing to help.since he went to Indian say school but it's been 2yrs since he started to fill out forms and nothing yet. I'm so worried they cut off baby's monthly money from me it's our only source of ii ncome for him. I'm prepared for the worst but really hurts to think about. I'd feel like a failure of a mother if that happened. With the money that I recieved I got my baby and our every need with it. Since we moved out on our own away from my parents who are practically chain smokers, we couldn't be there any more. But thanks to whom ever took the time to read, god bless you and take care šŸ™šŸ½šŸ™šŸ½šŸ™šŸ½