You can make such a difference in the world to others and inadvertently to yourself by smiling at people who seem to need it, even in the supermarket, anywhere. It's a gift you give...validating others, the quiet ones who never ask....that is where you will gain energy and strength and joy in yourself. This is what I do. It is powerful. :)

I am putting out focused energy into the universe and my prayers that your soul will heal and that strength and clarity will cleanse your mind and heart. Suffering like you describe is truly heartbreaking BUT, it COULD change. Read the poem "Hope is a thing with feathers" by Emily Dickinson. Sweetest poem and so powerful. Memorize it and say it to yourself with a smile if you can in your heart and breathe.