By waiting and by calm you shall be saved. In quiet and in trust your strength lies. - Isaiah 30:15

"What if my greatest disappointment for the aching of this life is the revealing of the greater thirst this world can't satisfy?"
- line from the song Blessings by Laura Story

"If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world." - C.S Lewis

Whatever you feel is not who you are. You are a beloved child of God. It is God's truth /word over your feelings. Which one is trustworthy? Definitely not your feelings. You should live by faith and not by feelings. Many have been deceived by feelings. Read Rev.12 it says many have been deceived.

God's word is not confusing. You already said God in His word (Lk.11:9) told you to ask, then ask God what you really want which you already mentioned. Do not confuse God's word over any other consoling word. Always take God's word. I feel you brother for I experienced the same condition but praise God I have overcome through Jesus Christ. Do not throw away your great confidence in the Lord for it will greatly be rewarded. Remember our victory is already done no matter what we go through. I pray for you