I am confused with my feelings of late. I dunno if I'm depressed because of the consequences of the injury I sustained or because I've been longing for someone to come back in my life. Either way, I am not in high spirits. I would find myself alone and searching for the meaning of why things turn out the way they do.

I miss him so much although I know my happiness should not depend on him. I know that he's nothing but bad news but then he is also the same person who makes me feel safe.

I have made a conscious effort to lessen our connection but I would fail at some point. He still has power over me. I find it really hard to get past this one. I pray that I would find it in me to finally let it all go. Until then, I pray for more strength to endure.