I am dismayed. I have been running from legal problems for years it's a long way away to face it and I just got my life cleaned up from drugs and the problems havent gone away in twenty years. I wish god would make them all go away. But I did wrong I have to face it. In the meantime I have to work. I got a job at a mental hospital and there is no human way possible i could have passed a background check with active warrants no matter how non extradital they may be. So I was doing the intake process terrified of the response of the background check and there was errors in the computer. So they gave me the job I signed and got my employee number but they called me later to tell me to go to a different background center. I go in the morning. I am terrified. I dont like life here. I've made such a mess of things I dont see a way out. I wish I had made better decisions I was so young and dumb looking for attention and recognition. I know I did wrong but I dont know how to face it. I wish God would do the supernatural and take this weight off my life. I know I did wrong bi6t I'm stuck 1000 miles away and I'm just idk afraid and I know gods in control and hes a way maker I believe that but I am equally terrified. I need confirmation and strength and direction more now than ever. I just want to be a productive person now but I've dug this hole deep.and been running so long. I am nine months sober today is my anniversary it feels there are so many obstacles I dont want to face them. I cant go back to the way iwas living. Idk what to do . Cant go back dont know how to go forward. In limbo. If you guys please could help me in prayer I'd appreciate it. Since getting that call I've isolated in my room. I'm terrified of what I might here in that place tomorrow of rejection of embarrassment of shame I am terrified I have forever doomed myself. Like I dont knownwhy I feel this way. It's a fear that's been rooted deep. I've seen Gods work. I am a miracle in itself God has restored me and protected me and provided so why cant I shake this fear? God please make a way for me please comfort me please confirm your will to me please strengthen me and take away my past. Please help ABBA. I NEED YOU NOW MORE THAN EVER.