i have been in an ugly divorce procedures, then get back with my ex then now said our goodbyes again. i still love him so much but i cannot be a martyr type of a wife, knowing my husband has a lot of other women. its always been a competition with his family and work and friends. i am really in deep pain, after being with him in a long term relationship, only now that i found out all his secrets and lies during the marriage and even before the marriage. it is so hard to accept. its so painful to be betrayed from the one whom you love and trusted a long time. Now, i pray that I can truly forgive him and the people involved in messing our lives. I want to have peace of mind. I want to finally be free from him. I never intend to keep our child from him but he was the one keeping his distance and then accuses me and threats me. He is so weird and immature and I am really tired being understanding. I have been fair to him and our child but he is really unreasonable and immature. I want us to at least be good parents but he doesnt see it. I keep praying for him to realize my worth and my fairness but it seems the devil still wins him. He left me all the responsibilities too including financial and it is also hard for me. Please pray for us all especially the children involved. Thank You.